I've been trying to reason with her, but it feels like I'm not getting anywhere."I felt, for an instant, that same dark hopelessness. Jenna! But this time I've got Kay beside me to lend strength. Won't lose this one. Can't lose this one!Kay guessed what I was thinking, and said, "Rob? I love you. And we'll get her through this together. No way those bastards win again!" And I knew she wasn't referring only to Todd, but to the guy who had drugged my first love, as well as to his lawyer, the judge, everyone who had contributed to Jenna's death."Thank you, sweetie," I choked, as my voice failed me."Just hurry, Rob, I need you to hold me," and she hung up. I think it was more the case that she knew both of us needed to be held.Finished drying off, got dressed, and decided to grab a bagel on the way to the hospital, at the donut shop drive through. Their coffee is drinkable, too. Asked them to put cream cheese on a sesame bagel and cut it in half for me, then added a dozen assorted bagels. . empty." Endorphins." Gesundheit." Ha ha. Brain chemicals. Pain causes your body to release natural narcotics into your blood. You could be getting high on your own endorphins. Be careful you don't turn into a pain slut." 'Pain slut'? Oh, yuck. That sounds awful." Some girls get hooked on the endorphins. It makes you a masochist. Some take it too far and end up mutilated, or worse." You're scaring me." I hope so. People get addicted to all sorts of things, not just street drugs." They give us all this anti-drug information in school. But it's all about not drinking and not doing party drugs. Why don't they say anything about endorphins?" Probably because they don't want you to know the synthetic narcotics they are warning you about are just weak imitations of the stuff your own body produces. You, above all people, should know that there is no drug that can match what you can do inside your own head." You mean like making an orgasm last all day? Or being able to trance-out whenever I.
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